Today's question

(I just realized it's 2 AM, so I guess that makes it yesterday's question -- sorry!)

It takes two to tango, as the saying goes, and those of us who enjoy getting tied up need someone to do the tying. A, now single, liked to indulge in mild to moderate bondage play, and she'd like to know what -- as a "singleton" -- can she do to simulate the feeling of being bound and helpless, while still leaving at least one hand free to pleasure herself, beyond a vivid imagination and reading in the genre beforehand.

[Please don't open these links with minors around :)]

This is a toughie but I have some thoughts, thanks to my favorite BDSM retail site, Extreme Restraints.

The Doggy-Style Spreader is kinky as hell. Yeah, $188 isn't cheap, but just imagine the thoughts one could think while... *sigh* Just leave one hand free and have a blast.

I'm not too sure if I'd like this one: The Self-Bondage Time Lock - my bladder's the size of a pea (no pun intended). I'm thinking you could cuff an ankle to a wrist and hope to God the ice melts.

This cuff and tether kit allows for a lot of movement and is cheap, but you would have to use safety-release cuffs. Heck, you could use scarves as tethers and watch some porn -- and force yourself to keep your hands behind the chair until the last 15 minutes of the movie. That way you've got a psychological component thrown in there.


Thigh cuff sets could work. You'd have to keep the cuff part toward the center insides of your thighs, not the outside. I think you could use velcro cuffs and still be able to unfasten them if your opposite hand was close by.

This hog-tie kit when used in this position (I'd cuff my hands under the knees), might work. Cheap too.

You'd have to leave one hand out obviously, but this locking fiddle might let you "fiddle" around solo.

At over $600, this ain't cheap, but it's incredibly cool: The Trap Bondage Device. I'm pretty sure you could manage locking yourself up in this. You'd have to be flexible and lay out the wrist cuff though, and you'd want to lock in your neck after pulling the leg stocks up.

I'm wondering if a some sturdy neoprene-style cuffs that can come apart would be your best bet. Cuff a wrist to an ankle, or ankle to ankle then up to the bedpost where you hook in the wrist cuff with your free hand. Or maybe lie on the floor and tie your ankles to either side of your bed's footboard. You'd have the sensation of being forcibly spread wide.

Another thing to possibly rig up is a hammock. String it up over your bed and crawl underneath. Feet find holes -- maybe twist up in them good and tight -- then your spare hand finds a hole. Depending on how low you set it up, you'd have the sensation of being trapped plus the ropes rubbing against you. [I'd go for soft ropes ;)]

Whatever you do, you probably know to check the Velcro, etc. in a test run to make sure you can get out before doing anything that could put you in any kind of danger. I'd also suggest you check out a local BDSM group with a excellent reputation for upholding the Safe, Sane, Consensual creed... Then maybe you can find a partner who enjoys bondage just as much as you do!

Good luck and let me know how it goes!